My Stepmom Spirit Guide

I have a Stepmom Spirit Guide. She’s the one who has been there, done that. For real. My friend, the Guide, as I’ll call her, is a stepmom, too. Our stories are similar. My experience mirrors hers. The relationship I have with the girl child is so similar to hers, that it’s eerie. Our husbands are similar. They parent similarly. The exes are similar, too. The only difference is she’s about eight years ahead of me on her journey. She’s my shining light at the end of the tunnel, my disco ball, my Sherpa.

When I started dating the Captain I remember long conversations usually over a hot bowl of Paneer Tikka Masala and Chai Tea or Korean BBQ (yes, I probably stuff all the feels down with food). She would share her stories, and I’d take a deep breath and think, “That’s not going to happen to me!” Well, if I would have put a dollar on everything she said coming true I’d have a nice table from HomeGoods by now.

The most important thing, through all of this, is that I have a friend, a dear friend, who I trust implicitly. A sister who has helped guide me, listened to me cry hysterically, hugged me, made me laugh, told me what will come next, or when I’m full of shit or too sensitive, and most importantly, told me that my feelings are valid and important. If it wasn’t for her, I don’t know where I’d be.

I think when I start a stepmom support group (yes, I think there needs to be one), she should be our fearless leader. There will be drinks, food – lots of food, and tissues. Oh and I think we should have badges, like the Girl Scouts. For every milestone we make it through, as unscathed as possible, we get a badge. And, one-by-one, we’ll learn from our Stepmom Spirit Guide, on our journey as stepmoms.